I HAVEN'T PUT ANYTHING INTO MY BLOG FOR A FEW DAYS. NOT BECAUSE I WAS FEELING WORSE, BUT ACTUALLY BECAUSE I WAS STARTING TO FEEL A LITTLE BETTER AT 3 WEEKS OUT FROM THE LAST CHEMO. I WAS ABLE TO BE A LITTLE MORE ACTIVE, BUT STILL HAD TO TAKE FREQUENT REST PERIODS TO RECOVER. I WENT TO CHURCH ON SUNDAY & BIBLE STUDY THIS MORNING, WHICH WAS GREAT! THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR YOUR PRAYERS! IT MAKES A BIG DIFFERENCE!
-I WAS ALSO ABLE TO BUY AN EASTER DRESS THAT I LOVE, FOR LESS THAN HALF PRICE. THAT'S EXCITING TO ME. I HAVEN'T BOUGHT ANY NEW CLOTHES FOR QUITE A WHILE. I'M NOT UP TO MY OLD "SHOP TIL YOU DROP" STANDARDS, BY ANY MEANS, BUT IT MADE ME FEEL MORE NORMAL. I EVEN TOOK MY WIG OFF IN THE DRESSING ROOM & DISCOVERED YOU DON'T HAVE TO BRUSH HAIR THAT'S NOT THERE. CLOTHES ALSO SLIP OVER YOUR BALD HEAD MUCH MORE EASILY THAN WHEN YOU'RE "HAIRY". ALL YOU HAVE TO DO IS PLOP THE WIG BACK ON WHEN YOU'RE DONE. I COULD GET USED TO THIS EVEN AFTER CHEMO IS DONE & MY HAIR GROWS BACK AGAIN. I WAS ABLE TO PURCHASE A RUFFLEY EASTER DRESS & SHORT SWEATER TO WEAR ON SUNDAY. NOW I JUST HAVE TO FEEL GOOD ENOUGH TO GO TO CHURCH AGAIN THIS SUNDAY, SINCE IT WILL ONLY BE THE 3rd DAY AFTER CHEMO . THE LORD KNOWS WHAT I NEED & WILL DIRECT ME ACCORDINGLY.
-I'VE BEEN TRYING TO INCORPORATE A TINY BIT OF EXERCISE INTO MY ROUTINE, SO WAS ABLE TO WALK WITH THE FAMILY AROUND THE BLOCK A COUPLE OF TIMES, ABOUT A WEEK APART.
WE PROBABLY LOOKED LIKE QUITE A PARADE WITH FAMILY MEMBERS, BIKES, & A COUPLE OF DOGS THAT ARE TRYING TO LEARN HOW TO WALK COMFORTABLY ON LEASHES. I DID MUCH BETTER THAN I THOUGHT, BUT STILL HAD TO REST & DRINK PLENTY OF WATER AFTERWARDS. IT REALLY FELT GOOD TO BE OUT & ABOUT IN THE FRESH AIR.
TODAY I HAD MY THIRD IV CHEMOTHERAPY TREATMENT. IT'S BEEN 3 WEEKS SINCE THE LAST & THE NEXT ONE WILL ALSO BE 3 WEEKS FROM TODAY (AROUND MAY 12th). THAT'S HOW LONG IT SEEMS TO TAKE MY BODY TO RECOVER SUFFICIENTLY TO HANDLE MORE. MY WHITE BLOOD CELL COUNT WAS NOT BACK TO NORMAL YET, BUT BETTER THAN IT HAD BEEN. WHEN THEY PUSHED THE SECOND MORE TOXIC DRUG INTO MY IV, I REACTED RIGHT AWAY, EVEN AT A 20% LOWER DOSE OF CHEMO. I STARTED TO FEEL DIZZY, THEN NAUSEATED, THEN MY IV HAND GOT TINGLEY & KIND OF NUMB. I GUESS IT WENT STRAIGHT TO MY HEAD/BRAIN VERY RAPIDLY & THEN EVERYWHERE ELSE, WHICH HAS NEVER HAPPENED BEFORE. THE NURSE HAD TO SLOW THE INFUSION FOR A LITTLE WHILE FOR MY BODY TO ADJUST. MY RIGHT EYE EVEN STARTED TWITCHING FOR A SHORT WHILE BEFORE WE LEFT. I GUESS IT'S PRETTY POTENT STUFF. EVERYTHING RESOLVED BEFORE I LEFT. I SUCKED ON ICE CHIPS AGAIN THIS TIME, WHICH REALLY HELPED PREVENT MOST OF THE MOUTH SORES LAST TIME. ARTIE WAS REALLY SWEET & WENT & GOT ME A JAMBA JUICE SMOOTHIE WHICH TASTED A WHOLE LOT BETTER THAN THE HANFORD WATER ICE CHIPS I BROUGHT WITH ME. HE ALSO GOT SOME VITAMINS FROM THE HEALTH FOOD STORE, WHILE MY CHEMO WAS RUNNING, THAT I WAS LOW ON. THEY HELP MY BODY REPLACE WHAT THE CHEMO TAKES AWAY. I FEEL REALLY BLESSED & CARED FOR & AGAIN THANK YOU FOR YOUR PRAYERS & CONCERN.
Thursday, April 21, 2011
Friday, April 15, 2011
REPRIEVE
HI ALL! LOVE & BLESSINGS! I GOT A WEEK'S REPRIEVE FROM CHEMO AGAIN. THE TRANSFUSION ALLOWED MY RED BLOOD CELL COUNT, HEMAGLOBIN, & HEMATOCRIT LEVELS, WHICH ARE INTER-RELATED, TO JUMP BACK UP INTO THE NORMAL RANGE. MY WHITE BLOOD CELL COUNT IS ONLY SLIGHTLY LOW & NOT FAR FROM NORMAL. MY PLATELETTES ARE STILL VERY LOW & AFFECTING MY ENERGY A LOT, WHICH IS WHY CHEMO WAS POSTPONED UNTIL NEXT THURSDAY APRIL 21st . THIS GIVES ME ANOTHER WEEK TO RECOVER, WHICH I FEEL I NEED. THIS MAKES ALL MY TREATMENTS 3 WEEKS APART, WHICH I GUESS MY BODY IS SAYING IT NEEDS TO REVIVE. I'VE SPENT A LOT OF TIME LAYING DOWN & RESTING. I ALSO NEED TO MAKE A CONCERTED EFFORT TO DRINK MORE WATER & INCREASE MY PROTEIN INTAKE. ACCORDING TO THE ONCOLOGIST OFFICE, I'VE LOST TEN POUNDS IN THE LAST WEEK. I DO WEIGH MYSELF DAILY AT HOME & ONLY LOST 5 POUNDS BY MY CALCULATIONS, BUT I STILL NEED TO CONCENTRATE ON EATING A LITTLE MORE. I THINK THEIR ESTIMATE OF WEIGHT LOSS WAS AFFECTED BY THE FACT THAT IT WAS A WARMER DAY & I WAS WEARING LIGHTER CLOTHING, I WORE A SCARF INSTEAD OF A WIG WHICH WEIGHS LESS, I HAD AN EMPTY STOMACH & NORMALLY EAT BEFORE I GO, AND I TOOK MY SHOES OFF BEFORE WEIGHING. AS I'VE MENTIONED BEFORE, MOST OF US CAN STAND TO LOSE A FEW POUNDS HERE & THERE, BUT I DON'T RECOMMEND GETTING CANCER TO DO IT, & LOSING THAT MUCH IN A WEEK IS PROBABLY NOT RECOMMENDED. ANYWAY, I HAD BEEN WORKING ON EATING EXTRA PROTEIN & DRINKING EXTRA WATER PRIOR TO THIS, BUT HAD FORGOTTEN TO DO SO IN THE LAST WEEK. I THINK THE FACT THAT MY NEW HANDHELD NEBULIZER BREATHING TREATMENT WASN'T WORKING RIGHT, DIDN'T HELP THINGS EITHER. THE COMPANY SENT OUT A NEW ONE QUICKLY, WHICH WORKS MUCH BETTER. (35 MINUTE TREATMENT 3 TIMES A DAY AS OPPOSED TO THE OLD ONE THAT WAS TAKING 1 & 1/2 HOURS OR MORE EACH TIME.) IT GREATLY FRUSTRATED ME & TOOK A GREAT DEAL OF MY TIME & ATTENTION. SHORTER TREATMENTS ARE WORKING MUCH BETTER & WILL HOPEFULLY GET MEDICINE DIRECTLY TO MY SINUSES WITH BETTER RESULTS & FEWER OVERALL SIDE EFFECTS. I AM GREATFUL TO GOD I DIDN'T GIVE UP. I WAS SERIOUSLY TEMPTED TO DO SO. MY DOCTOR EVEN CALLED TODAY TO SEE HOW I'M DOING WITH IT. THE NEW MACHINE & MEDICINES SHOULD REALLY HELP BY THE TIME I SEE HIM FOR A "SINUS" CHECKUP ON MONDAY. I'VE ALSO NOTICED I WAS GETTING KIND OF CRANKY THE LAST COUPLE OF DAYS. I WAS BOTHERED BY ANYTHING & EVERYTHING. I FINALLY REALIZED THAT I'M USED TO MAKING MY OWN DECISIONS, GOING PLACES , & DOING THINGS WHEN I WANT TO OR NEED TO. A LOT OF THAT HAS CHANGED SINCE I WAS DIAGNOSED & HAVE BEGUN TREATMENT. I RELY ON MY FAMILY TO DO MY NORMAL THINGS LIKE GROCERY SHOPPING & COOKING & GETTING ME TO MY APPOINTMENTS. I DON'T OFTEN GET TO DRIVE MYSELF ANYWHERE, UNLESS IT'S VERY LOCAL & I'M HAVING A GOOD DAY. THINGS HAVE CHANGED FOR NOW WITH MORE CHANGES ON THE HORIZON. I TRUST THE LORD WHO IS IN THE DRIVER'S SEAT & WILL GET ME TO MY DESTINATION ONE DAY AT A TIME. HE GIVES US HELP & THE GRACE WE NEED FOR EACH DAY, AS WE NEED IT. EVENTUALLY I WILL REGROW MY HAIR, MY SCARS WILL HEAL, AND I WILL BE ABLE TO BE MORE INDEPENDENT AGAIN. A LITTLE MORE LIKE THE OLD ME BUT WITH ADDED INSIGHT, COMPASSION & FOCUS ON GOD & FAMILY INSTEAD OF THE PROBLEMS! THAT'S A GOOD CHANGE.
Thursday, April 14, 2011
Some of My Many Looks
I HAVE MY THIRD CHEMO TODAY, SO PLEASE REMEBER ME IN PRAYER. I PROBABLY WON'T BE UP TO WRITING ANYTHING FOR A FEW DAYS. THANKS SO MUCH FOR YOUR LOVE AND PRAYERS. IN THE MEANTIME, ENJOY THESE PICTURES OF MY NEW VERSATILE LOOKS.
Monday, April 11, 2011
DON'T LOOK IF YOU DON'T WANT TO SEE THE BALD TRUTH
HI AGAIN & BLESSINGS ON YOU ALL. I FINALLY LET MY DAUGHTER TAKE A "BALD" PHOTO OF ME.
MY HUSBAND SURPRISED ME WITH A RESERVATION AT A REALLY NICE RESTAURANT WE HAVE WANTED TO TRY FOR YEARS: RUTH'S CHRIS STEAK HOUSE IN FRESNO. I WAS REALLY SURPRISED AS MONEY HAS BEEN REALLY TIGHT LATELY WITH ARTIE BEING SELF-EMPLOYED NOW & ME ON A LEAVE OF ABSENCE FROM WORK. WHERE'S THAT PTO WHEN YOU NEED IT? (ALL USED UP I'M AFRAID) ANYWAY, THE KIDS HAVE BEEN HELPING THEIR PARENTS OUT IN A KIND OF REVERSAL OF ROLES. I REMEMBER HOW STRANGE IT FELT WHEN THE SAME THING HAPPENED TO ME WHEN MY MOM GOT SICK & THE KIDS & I UPROOTED FOR A WHILE TO TAKE CARE OF HER. THAT WAS A REALLY LONG TIME AGO.
WE GOT DRESSED UP TO GO OUT & I LET REBECCA TAKE THE BALD PICTURE BEFORE WE LEFT HOME FOR OUR ANNIVERSARY DATE WITH THE UNDERSTANDING THAT SHE WOULD ALSO TAKE A "NORMAL" LOOKING PICTURE FOR CONTRAST, WHEN I PUT MY WIG ON. IT KIND OF HELPED TO HAVE NICE MAKEUP ON & NICE CLOTHES FOR A CHANGE. WHEN WE GOT TO THE RESTAURANT ALL THE GOOD THINGS I HAD HEARD PALED IN COMPARISON. IT WAS SO NICE & THE FOOD WAS SO GOOD. I HAD SHRIMP & STEAK, BUT THE STEAK WAS SO GOOD, I DIDN'T WANT TO WASTE STOMACH ROOM ON MORE THAN 1 SHRIMP. THERE WAS SOME OF BOTH LEFT OVER TO TAKE HOME. ARTIE SAID IT WAS THE BEST STEAK HE HAS EVER EATEN. IT WAS BROUGHT TO THE TABLE ON A SIZZLING PLATE. THEY SEAR THE OUTSIDE QUICKLY AT 1800 DEGREES TO KEEP IN THE JUICES & FLAVOR. THEY BRING IT OUT KIND OF RARE, BUT YOU CAN SLICE IT UP & SEAR IT ON THE HOT PLATES UNTIL IT'S COOKED TO YOUR LIKING. THEY SEASON WITH SALT & PEPPER ONLY & SERVE IT SURROUNDED BY MELTED BUTTER. YOU MIGHT CONSIDER THAT A HEART ATTACK ON A PLATE, BUT IT WAS SO GOOD! HOPEFULLY A ONCE A YEAR INDULGENCE WILL BE OK. THERE WERE ROSE PETALS ON THE TABLE FOR OUR ANNIVERSARY TOO! THEY SMELLED SO GOOD & LOOKED SO PRETTY. OUR WAITRESS WAS ALSO A PRE-SCHOOL TEACHER BY DAY& A SUPER SERVER BY NIGHT. SHE PROMISED TO ROLL US OUT OF THE RESTAURANT IF NEED BE AFTER DESSERT CAME. EACH PLATE HAD "HAPPY ANNIVERSARY" WRITTEN IN HARDENED CHOCOLATE AROUND THE EDGES. THEY EVEN UPGRADED ONE OF OUR DESSERTS FOR OUR ANNIVERSARY FOR FREE. I WAS SO IMPRESSED. WE HAD A WONDERFUL TIME. I THINK WE HAVE A NEW FAVORITE FOR SPECIAL OCCASIONS. WHEN WE GOT HOME, THE KIDS WERE IN BED & REBECCA HAD ME LAUGHING SO HARD I WAS CRYING DESCRIBING THIER SMALL TOWN DINNER ADVENTURES & HER VERSION OF 4 & 9 YR OLD VERY LITERAL OBSERVATIONS OF EATING IN A DESERTED LOCAL RESTAURANT WHERE THE WAITRESS WAS ASKING THE CUSOMER TO EXPLAIN WHAT THEY WANTED TO ORDER THAT WAS DIRECTLY OFF THE MENU SO SHE COULD EXPLAIN IT TO THE COOK. CALEB WANTED TO KNOW WHY THE WAITRESS WAS ASKING THEM WHAT A FLAUTA WAS. DOESN'T EVERYONE KNOW WHAT A FLAUTA IS, HE QUERIED? NEVER A DULL MOMENT & ONLY IN A SMALL TOWN. ANYWAY, THEY HAD A GREAT TIME TOO.
TODAY WE PLANNED TO GO TO CHURCH & MEET MY DAD & STEP MOM FOR LUNCH. UNFORTUNATELY, THE LAST THREE BUSY DAYS TOOK THEIR TOLL ON MY ENERGY. MY GET UP & GO GOT UP & WENT BEFORE I EVEN GOT UP IN THE MORNING. I WAS SO TIRED AFTER LABS & ONCOLOGY ON THURSDAY, MORE LABS ANEMIA & TRANSFUSIONS ON FRIDAY, AND SATURDAY'S SITTING IN THE GARAGE WHILE BECKY HELD UP THINGS FOR ME TO DETERMINE GARAGE SALE OR KEEP FOR A FUTURE DATE. I THOUGHT I WAS RESTING BECAUSE I WAS JUST SITTING THERE. I ALSO HAD TO FIGURE OUT HOW TO USE A NEW HANDHELD NEBULIZER SYSTEM THAT TOOK 1 TO 1+1/2 HOURS TO USE. I WAS SUPPOSED TO USE IT 3 TIMES A DAY & ONLY ENDED UP USING IT TWICE BECAUSE OF BEING FRUSTRATED AT HOW LONG IT TOOK, AND NOT BEING SURE WHETHER I WAS EVEN DOING IT RIGHT. I TRIED CALLING THEIR TOLL FREE NUMBER BUT APPARENTLY THEY AREN'T THERE ON THE WEEKENDS. GUESS WE'LL BE MAKING A PHONE CALL ON A WEEKDAY TO FIGURE IT OUT.THEN WE WENT ON OUR DATE THAT NIGHT, WHICH I DON'T REGRET IN THE LEAST. TO SAY I WAS POOPED IS PUTTING IT MILDLY, BUT I THINK I NEED TO RELEARN THE PART ABOUT RESTING AGAIN. I GUESS I FORGOT & IT ALL CAUGHT UP WITH ME. REBECCA TOOK THE KIDS & WAS ABLE TO MEET MY FOLKS WITH MY APOLOGIES THEN WENT TO COSTCO TO GET SOME MUCH NEEDED ITEMS FOR ME & THE HOUSEHOLD. WE ALL ARE LEARNING ABOUT CHANGING PLANS & RESTING MORE.
PLEASE PRAY FOR:
1.)STRENGTH & WISDOM IN USING MY ENERGY WISELY
2.)CONTINUE TO REMEMBER MY NEW AQUAINTANCE STEVE &
HIS DEVOTED FAMILY. MET THEM FRI @ TRANSFUSION.
3.)MY SORE MOUTH. I'VE DEVELOPED 2 MOUTH SORES IN THE
LAST 2 DAYS WHICH IS KIND OF LATE IN THE GAME. 1 ON MY
RIGHT CHEEK & 1 ON THE RIGHT SIDE OF THE BACK OF MY
TONGUE. MY THROAT IS REALLY DRY& SCRATCHY. IT'S BEEN
10 DAYS SINCE MY LAST CHEMO. I HAD A MOUTH FULL AFTER
THE 1st CHEMO & BY SUCKING ON ICE DURING #2 AVOIDED
MOST, SO TWO IS BETTER. COULD BE JUST A FEVER BLISTER
OR BECAUSE MY RBC & WBC COUNTS HAVE BEEN SO LOW. NOT
SURE. BUT THEY DO HURT A LOT.
4.)SEVERAL CLOSE FAMILY MEMBERS ARE HURTING BECAUSE OF
UNEXPECTED DIVORCES FOR 2 DIFFERENT FAMILY MEMBERS.
PLEASE PRAY FOR THE LORD TO HEAL ALL PARTIES INVOLVED.
DIVORCE AFFECTS MORE THAN JUST 2 PEOPLE.
(FORGIVE THE RANTING/ SKIP THIS PART IT YOU LIKE. MY SON
SAYS I DO IT TOO MUCH & HE'S PROBABLY RIGHT.) IT AFFECTS
CHILDREN WHO DON'T UNDERSTAND WHY THINGS HAVE
CHANGED OR PERHAPS HAVE BEEN THROUGH IT TOO MANY
TIMES & COULD BECOME CALLOUS OR CONVINCED THAT THIS,
IS THE NORM & WILL BE PART OF THEIR PATTERN TOO. PLEASE
PRAY THAT THE CYCLE WILL END. DIVORCE ALSO AFFECTS
PARENTS & ESPECIALLY MOMS WHO LOVE THEIR ADULT
CHILDREN & WISH THEY COULD STILL KISS THE OWIE & MAKE
IT BETTER, LIKE WHEN THEY WERE LITTLE, BUT YOU CAN'T.
THERE ARE ALSO CHANGES & STRAINS IN FORMER RELATION-
SHIPS. PLACES YOU USED TO GO FOR FAMILY GATHERINGS
& GET TOGETHERS THAT YOU ARE SUDDENLY NO LONGER
WELCOME TO, EVEN THOUGH YOU ARE THE SAME PERSON
YOU'VE ALWAYS BEEN & HAVEN'T DONE ANYTHING WRONG.
YOU MIGHT EVEN GET BLAMED FOR SOME OF THE PROBLEMS
THAT YOU DIDN'T CAUSE. IT MAKES FOR SOME STRANGE
SITUATIONS & STRANGE FEELINGS THAT HAVE TO BE DEALT
WITH, SOMETIMES MORE THAN ONCE. OTHERWISE YOU CAN
END UP SEVERELY DEPRESSED LIKE I WAS LAST YEAR. SOME
TIMES YOU HAVE TO DRAW LINES IN THE SAND/BOUNDARIES
FOR YOUR OWN SAKE & THAT OF YOUR KIDS & GRANDKIDS .
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO RISK BEING MISUNDERSTOOD.
ALWAYS YOU HAVE TO LAY IT AT THE LORD'S FEET & LEAVE
IT THERE SO YOU CAN MOVE ON.SOMETIMES IT'S IN YOUR FACE
& YOU HAVE TO CHOOSE TO FIGHT THAT SINKING FEELING, TO
SEPARATE YOURSELF FROM THE THINGS & THE PEOPLE THAT
ARE DESTRUCTIVE TO YOUR HEART, EVEN IF IT MEANS YOU
HAVE TO RUN TO A QUIET CORNER OR WALK OUT OF YOUR
OWN HOME FOR A SHORT BREAK, TO NOT PARTICIPATE IN THE
INSANITY. YOU HAVE TO CHASE AFTER TIME WITH THE LORD
AND YOUR OWN MOMENTS OF ALONE TIME & PEACE & QUIET.
YOU HAVE TO MEDITATE ON WHAT IS TRUE & RIGHT & GOOD.
IT'S NOT AN EASY THING FOR ANYONE BUT IT HAS GREAT
REWARDS. YOU HAVE TO SURROUND YOURSELF WITH
POSITIVE PEOPLE, EVEN IF IT MEANS LEARNING HOW TO MAKE
NEW FRIENDS AGAIN. YOU HAVE TO WORSHIP REGULARLY IN
A PLACE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CONNECT WITH GOD &OTHERS
YOU HAVE TO MAKE SURE THERE ARE NO MEDICAL ISSUES
GOING ON & TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF & ANYTHING MEDICAL
OR EMOTIONAL THAT'S FOUND. I KNOW I WAS SURPRISED BY
THAT ONE, HENCE MY CANCER ADVENTURES. I ALSO WENT
FOR COUNCELING FOR A TIME, ESPECIALLY WHEN I STARTED
MAKING MISTAKES AT WORK. IT REALLY SCARED ME & MADE
ME ACTIVELY SEEK OUT HELP. YOU ALSO HAVE FIND OUT
WHAT HEALTHY THINGS MAKE YOU HAPPY & PURSUE THEM
AS BEST AS YOU CAN. YOU NEED TO GET ENOUGH REST, BUT
YOU ALSO NEED TO MOVE YOUR BODY. EVEN IF ALL YOU CAN
DO IS FINGER CALLESTHENICS. YOU KNOW, INDEX FINGERS
POINT UP THEN SIDEWAYS, POINT UP THEN SIDEWAYS. 1-2-1-2
AT LEAST YOU'RE MOVING SOMETHING. YOU ALSO HAVE TO
FIND WAYS TO HELP OTHERS EVEN IF YOU CAN'T PHYSICALLY
OR EVEN MENTALLY DO MUCH (LIKE WHEN THE BRAIN FOGG
SETS IN FOR ME OR BLOOD SUGARS ARE RUNNING LOW.) GOD
HAS SHOWN ME AT EVEN MY LOWEST EBB, THERE IS ALWAYS
SOMETHING I CAN DO HOWEVER SMALL THAT HONORS HIM.
THANK YOU FOR LISTENING TO MY RANTING & RAVING. MY DAUGHTER SAYS ITS GOOD FOR ME TO EXPRESS MYSELF. IT
CLARIFIES MY THOUGHTS & MAKES ME FEEL BETTER EVEN IF I HAVE A SLIGHTLY CRAZED LOOK IN MY EYE OR STAND ON A SOAPBOX FOR A SHORT WHILE. I HAVE BEEN A QUIET PERSON & HAD NOT BEEN ABLE TO EXPRESS MYSELF VERBALLY FOR MOST OF MY LIFE. THAT WASN'T ALLOWED WHEN I WAS LITTLE & IT'S KIND OF HARD TO CHANGE THE PATTERN AS AN ADULT. I WAS AN OBSERVER& DREAMER, NOT A DOER. FORTUNATELY I MARRIED A DOER. I DIDN'T NORMALLY LIKE CHANGES OF ANY KIND IN MY LIFE OR AROUND ME. MY SECURITY WAS IN WHAT WAS NORMAL. MY FOCUS WAS ON ANY PROBLEMS. IF ANYTHING VARIED, I DIDN'T USUALLY LIKE THAT. I WAS A PERFECTIONSIST IN AN IMPERFECT WORLD. MY FRIEND MARIA, WAS ALSWAYS ABLE TO BRING ME BACK TO EARTH WITH HER CALM WORDS & REMINDERS OF WHAT WE HAD THAT WAS GOOD, WHEN I WOULD PANIC WITH ALL THE SEEMINGLY IMPOSSIBLE CHANGES AT WORK. AND SHE WAS ALWAYS RIGHT. THE LORD IS TEACHING ME ABOUT CHANGE & GROWTH & THE GOOD THAT CAN BE FOUND IN ALMOST EVERY SITUATION. HE'S WORKING ON MY HEART & BUILDING ME UP. I DON'T WANT TO GO BACK TO BEING THE SAME WAY I WAS BEFORE MY ADVENTURES BEGAN. HE'S CHANGING ME FROM THE INSIDE OUT & MAYBE EVEN TEACHING ME TO ENJOY SOME OF THE CHOICES & CHANGES I CAN MAKE. HE'S ALWAYS SO GOOD. HOW CAN I COMPLAIN?
SATURDAY WAS OUR 35th WEDDING ANNIVERSARY.
MY HUSBAND SURPRISED ME WITH A RESERVATION AT A REALLY NICE RESTAURANT WE HAVE WANTED TO TRY FOR YEARS: RUTH'S CHRIS STEAK HOUSE IN FRESNO. I WAS REALLY SURPRISED AS MONEY HAS BEEN REALLY TIGHT LATELY WITH ARTIE BEING SELF-EMPLOYED NOW & ME ON A LEAVE OF ABSENCE FROM WORK. WHERE'S THAT PTO WHEN YOU NEED IT? (ALL USED UP I'M AFRAID) ANYWAY, THE KIDS HAVE BEEN HELPING THEIR PARENTS OUT IN A KIND OF REVERSAL OF ROLES. I REMEMBER HOW STRANGE IT FELT WHEN THE SAME THING HAPPENED TO ME WHEN MY MOM GOT SICK & THE KIDS & I UPROOTED FOR A WHILE TO TAKE CARE OF HER. THAT WAS A REALLY LONG TIME AGO.
WE GOT DRESSED UP TO GO OUT & I LET REBECCA TAKE THE BALD PICTURE BEFORE WE LEFT HOME FOR OUR ANNIVERSARY DATE WITH THE UNDERSTANDING THAT SHE WOULD ALSO TAKE A "NORMAL" LOOKING PICTURE FOR CONTRAST, WHEN I PUT MY WIG ON. IT KIND OF HELPED TO HAVE NICE MAKEUP ON & NICE CLOTHES FOR A CHANGE. WHEN WE GOT TO THE RESTAURANT ALL THE GOOD THINGS I HAD HEARD PALED IN COMPARISON. IT WAS SO NICE & THE FOOD WAS SO GOOD. I HAD SHRIMP & STEAK, BUT THE STEAK WAS SO GOOD, I DIDN'T WANT TO WASTE STOMACH ROOM ON MORE THAN 1 SHRIMP. THERE WAS SOME OF BOTH LEFT OVER TO TAKE HOME. ARTIE SAID IT WAS THE BEST STEAK HE HAS EVER EATEN. IT WAS BROUGHT TO THE TABLE ON A SIZZLING PLATE. THEY SEAR THE OUTSIDE QUICKLY AT 1800 DEGREES TO KEEP IN THE JUICES & FLAVOR. THEY BRING IT OUT KIND OF RARE, BUT YOU CAN SLICE IT UP & SEAR IT ON THE HOT PLATES UNTIL IT'S COOKED TO YOUR LIKING. THEY SEASON WITH SALT & PEPPER ONLY & SERVE IT SURROUNDED BY MELTED BUTTER. YOU MIGHT CONSIDER THAT A HEART ATTACK ON A PLATE, BUT IT WAS SO GOOD! HOPEFULLY A ONCE A YEAR INDULGENCE WILL BE OK. THERE WERE ROSE PETALS ON THE TABLE FOR OUR ANNIVERSARY TOO! THEY SMELLED SO GOOD & LOOKED SO PRETTY. OUR WAITRESS WAS ALSO A PRE-SCHOOL TEACHER BY DAY& A SUPER SERVER BY NIGHT. SHE PROMISED TO ROLL US OUT OF THE RESTAURANT IF NEED BE AFTER DESSERT CAME. EACH PLATE HAD "HAPPY ANNIVERSARY" WRITTEN IN HARDENED CHOCOLATE AROUND THE EDGES. THEY EVEN UPGRADED ONE OF OUR DESSERTS FOR OUR ANNIVERSARY FOR FREE. I WAS SO IMPRESSED. WE HAD A WONDERFUL TIME. I THINK WE HAVE A NEW FAVORITE FOR SPECIAL OCCASIONS. WHEN WE GOT HOME, THE KIDS WERE IN BED & REBECCA HAD ME LAUGHING SO HARD I WAS CRYING DESCRIBING THIER SMALL TOWN DINNER ADVENTURES & HER VERSION OF 4 & 9 YR OLD VERY LITERAL OBSERVATIONS OF EATING IN A DESERTED LOCAL RESTAURANT WHERE THE WAITRESS WAS ASKING THE CUSOMER TO EXPLAIN WHAT THEY WANTED TO ORDER THAT WAS DIRECTLY OFF THE MENU SO SHE COULD EXPLAIN IT TO THE COOK. CALEB WANTED TO KNOW WHY THE WAITRESS WAS ASKING THEM WHAT A FLAUTA WAS. DOESN'T EVERYONE KNOW WHAT A FLAUTA IS, HE QUERIED? NEVER A DULL MOMENT & ONLY IN A SMALL TOWN. ANYWAY, THEY HAD A GREAT TIME TOO.
TODAY WE PLANNED TO GO TO CHURCH & MEET MY DAD & STEP MOM FOR LUNCH. UNFORTUNATELY, THE LAST THREE BUSY DAYS TOOK THEIR TOLL ON MY ENERGY. MY GET UP & GO GOT UP & WENT BEFORE I EVEN GOT UP IN THE MORNING. I WAS SO TIRED AFTER LABS & ONCOLOGY ON THURSDAY, MORE LABS ANEMIA & TRANSFUSIONS ON FRIDAY, AND SATURDAY'S SITTING IN THE GARAGE WHILE BECKY HELD UP THINGS FOR ME TO DETERMINE GARAGE SALE OR KEEP FOR A FUTURE DATE. I THOUGHT I WAS RESTING BECAUSE I WAS JUST SITTING THERE. I ALSO HAD TO FIGURE OUT HOW TO USE A NEW HANDHELD NEBULIZER SYSTEM THAT TOOK 1 TO 1+1/2 HOURS TO USE. I WAS SUPPOSED TO USE IT 3 TIMES A DAY & ONLY ENDED UP USING IT TWICE BECAUSE OF BEING FRUSTRATED AT HOW LONG IT TOOK, AND NOT BEING SURE WHETHER I WAS EVEN DOING IT RIGHT. I TRIED CALLING THEIR TOLL FREE NUMBER BUT APPARENTLY THEY AREN'T THERE ON THE WEEKENDS. GUESS WE'LL BE MAKING A PHONE CALL ON A WEEKDAY TO FIGURE IT OUT.THEN WE WENT ON OUR DATE THAT NIGHT, WHICH I DON'T REGRET IN THE LEAST. TO SAY I WAS POOPED IS PUTTING IT MILDLY, BUT I THINK I NEED TO RELEARN THE PART ABOUT RESTING AGAIN. I GUESS I FORGOT & IT ALL CAUGHT UP WITH ME. REBECCA TOOK THE KIDS & WAS ABLE TO MEET MY FOLKS WITH MY APOLOGIES THEN WENT TO COSTCO TO GET SOME MUCH NEEDED ITEMS FOR ME & THE HOUSEHOLD. WE ALL ARE LEARNING ABOUT CHANGING PLANS & RESTING MORE.
PLEASE PRAY FOR:
1.)STRENGTH & WISDOM IN USING MY ENERGY WISELY
2.)CONTINUE TO REMEMBER MY NEW AQUAINTANCE STEVE &
HIS DEVOTED FAMILY. MET THEM FRI @ TRANSFUSION.
3.)MY SORE MOUTH. I'VE DEVELOPED 2 MOUTH SORES IN THE
LAST 2 DAYS WHICH IS KIND OF LATE IN THE GAME. 1 ON MY
RIGHT CHEEK & 1 ON THE RIGHT SIDE OF THE BACK OF MY
TONGUE. MY THROAT IS REALLY DRY& SCRATCHY. IT'S BEEN
10 DAYS SINCE MY LAST CHEMO. I HAD A MOUTH FULL AFTER
THE 1st CHEMO & BY SUCKING ON ICE DURING #2 AVOIDED
MOST, SO TWO IS BETTER. COULD BE JUST A FEVER BLISTER
OR BECAUSE MY RBC & WBC COUNTS HAVE BEEN SO LOW. NOT
SURE. BUT THEY DO HURT A LOT.
4.)SEVERAL CLOSE FAMILY MEMBERS ARE HURTING BECAUSE OF
UNEXPECTED DIVORCES FOR 2 DIFFERENT FAMILY MEMBERS.
PLEASE PRAY FOR THE LORD TO HEAL ALL PARTIES INVOLVED.
DIVORCE AFFECTS MORE THAN JUST 2 PEOPLE.
(FORGIVE THE RANTING/ SKIP THIS PART IT YOU LIKE. MY SON
SAYS I DO IT TOO MUCH & HE'S PROBABLY RIGHT.) IT AFFECTS
CHILDREN WHO DON'T UNDERSTAND WHY THINGS HAVE
CHANGED OR PERHAPS HAVE BEEN THROUGH IT TOO MANY
TIMES & COULD BECOME CALLOUS OR CONVINCED THAT THIS,
IS THE NORM & WILL BE PART OF THEIR PATTERN TOO. PLEASE
PRAY THAT THE CYCLE WILL END. DIVORCE ALSO AFFECTS
PARENTS & ESPECIALLY MOMS WHO LOVE THEIR ADULT
CHILDREN & WISH THEY COULD STILL KISS THE OWIE & MAKE
IT BETTER, LIKE WHEN THEY WERE LITTLE, BUT YOU CAN'T.
THERE ARE ALSO CHANGES & STRAINS IN FORMER RELATION-
SHIPS. PLACES YOU USED TO GO FOR FAMILY GATHERINGS
& GET TOGETHERS THAT YOU ARE SUDDENLY NO LONGER
WELCOME TO, EVEN THOUGH YOU ARE THE SAME PERSON
YOU'VE ALWAYS BEEN & HAVEN'T DONE ANYTHING WRONG.
YOU MIGHT EVEN GET BLAMED FOR SOME OF THE PROBLEMS
THAT YOU DIDN'T CAUSE. IT MAKES FOR SOME STRANGE
SITUATIONS & STRANGE FEELINGS THAT HAVE TO BE DEALT
WITH, SOMETIMES MORE THAN ONCE. OTHERWISE YOU CAN
END UP SEVERELY DEPRESSED LIKE I WAS LAST YEAR. SOME
TIMES YOU HAVE TO DRAW LINES IN THE SAND/BOUNDARIES
FOR YOUR OWN SAKE & THAT OF YOUR KIDS & GRANDKIDS .
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO RISK BEING MISUNDERSTOOD.
ALWAYS YOU HAVE TO LAY IT AT THE LORD'S FEET & LEAVE
IT THERE SO YOU CAN MOVE ON.SOMETIMES IT'S IN YOUR FACE
& YOU HAVE TO CHOOSE TO FIGHT THAT SINKING FEELING, TO
SEPARATE YOURSELF FROM THE THINGS & THE PEOPLE THAT
ARE DESTRUCTIVE TO YOUR HEART, EVEN IF IT MEANS YOU
HAVE TO RUN TO A QUIET CORNER OR WALK OUT OF YOUR
OWN HOME FOR A SHORT BREAK, TO NOT PARTICIPATE IN THE
INSANITY. YOU HAVE TO CHASE AFTER TIME WITH THE LORD
AND YOUR OWN MOMENTS OF ALONE TIME & PEACE & QUIET.
YOU HAVE TO MEDITATE ON WHAT IS TRUE & RIGHT & GOOD.
IT'S NOT AN EASY THING FOR ANYONE BUT IT HAS GREAT
REWARDS. YOU HAVE TO SURROUND YOURSELF WITH
POSITIVE PEOPLE, EVEN IF IT MEANS LEARNING HOW TO MAKE
NEW FRIENDS AGAIN. YOU HAVE TO WORSHIP REGULARLY IN
A PLACE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CONNECT WITH GOD &OTHERS
YOU HAVE TO MAKE SURE THERE ARE NO MEDICAL ISSUES
GOING ON & TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF & ANYTHING MEDICAL
OR EMOTIONAL THAT'S FOUND. I KNOW I WAS SURPRISED BY
THAT ONE, HENCE MY CANCER ADVENTURES. I ALSO WENT
FOR COUNCELING FOR A TIME, ESPECIALLY WHEN I STARTED
MAKING MISTAKES AT WORK. IT REALLY SCARED ME & MADE
ME ACTIVELY SEEK OUT HELP. YOU ALSO HAVE FIND OUT
WHAT HEALTHY THINGS MAKE YOU HAPPY & PURSUE THEM
AS BEST AS YOU CAN. YOU NEED TO GET ENOUGH REST, BUT
YOU ALSO NEED TO MOVE YOUR BODY. EVEN IF ALL YOU CAN
DO IS FINGER CALLESTHENICS. YOU KNOW, INDEX FINGERS
POINT UP THEN SIDEWAYS, POINT UP THEN SIDEWAYS. 1-2-1-2
AT LEAST YOU'RE MOVING SOMETHING. YOU ALSO HAVE TO
FIND WAYS TO HELP OTHERS EVEN IF YOU CAN'T PHYSICALLY
OR EVEN MENTALLY DO MUCH (LIKE WHEN THE BRAIN FOGG
SETS IN FOR ME OR BLOOD SUGARS ARE RUNNING LOW.) GOD
HAS SHOWN ME AT EVEN MY LOWEST EBB, THERE IS ALWAYS
SOMETHING I CAN DO HOWEVER SMALL THAT HONORS HIM.
THANK YOU FOR LISTENING TO MY RANTING & RAVING. MY DAUGHTER SAYS ITS GOOD FOR ME TO EXPRESS MYSELF. IT
CLARIFIES MY THOUGHTS & MAKES ME FEEL BETTER EVEN IF I HAVE A SLIGHTLY CRAZED LOOK IN MY EYE OR STAND ON A SOAPBOX FOR A SHORT WHILE. I HAVE BEEN A QUIET PERSON & HAD NOT BEEN ABLE TO EXPRESS MYSELF VERBALLY FOR MOST OF MY LIFE. THAT WASN'T ALLOWED WHEN I WAS LITTLE & IT'S KIND OF HARD TO CHANGE THE PATTERN AS AN ADULT. I WAS AN OBSERVER& DREAMER, NOT A DOER. FORTUNATELY I MARRIED A DOER. I DIDN'T NORMALLY LIKE CHANGES OF ANY KIND IN MY LIFE OR AROUND ME. MY SECURITY WAS IN WHAT WAS NORMAL. MY FOCUS WAS ON ANY PROBLEMS. IF ANYTHING VARIED, I DIDN'T USUALLY LIKE THAT. I WAS A PERFECTIONSIST IN AN IMPERFECT WORLD. MY FRIEND MARIA, WAS ALSWAYS ABLE TO BRING ME BACK TO EARTH WITH HER CALM WORDS & REMINDERS OF WHAT WE HAD THAT WAS GOOD, WHEN I WOULD PANIC WITH ALL THE SEEMINGLY IMPOSSIBLE CHANGES AT WORK. AND SHE WAS ALWAYS RIGHT. THE LORD IS TEACHING ME ABOUT CHANGE & GROWTH & THE GOOD THAT CAN BE FOUND IN ALMOST EVERY SITUATION. HE'S WORKING ON MY HEART & BUILDING ME UP. I DON'T WANT TO GO BACK TO BEING THE SAME WAY I WAS BEFORE MY ADVENTURES BEGAN. HE'S CHANGING ME FROM THE INSIDE OUT & MAYBE EVEN TEACHING ME TO ENJOY SOME OF THE CHOICES & CHANGES I CAN MAKE. HE'S ALWAYS SO GOOD. HOW CAN I COMPLAIN?
Friday, April 8, 2011
TRANSFUSION DAY
TRANSFUSION DAY HAS COME & IS ALMOST GONE. I DID EXTREMELY WELL, BUT IT WAS A LONG LONG DAY. IT STARTED EARLY WITH A TRIP TO CHILDREN'S HOSPITAL TO GET MY REGULAR LAB WORK DONE FOR MY TRANSPLANT DOCTORS. THEY WILL USE THIS TO DETERMINE IF THEY NEED TO INCREASE MY MEDICINE OR NOT. SINCE I WAS SCHEDULED FOR THE TRANSFUSION LATER THAT DAY, I JOKINGLY TOLD THE LAB TECH SHE COULD TAKE AS MUCH BLOOD AS SHE WANTED SINCE I WAS GOING FOR A REFILL LATER. I'M A FREQUENT FLYER AT THE LAB, & THEY ALWAYS TREAT ME REALLY WELL. I EVEN PROMISED I WOULD HOLD STILL & NOT KICK & SCREAM & FIGHT & CRY. EXCEPT FOR THE EMPLOYEES, MOST OF THEIR PATIENTS ARE KIDS, SO THAT IS A FREQUENT OCCURENCE THERE. AFTER THE LAB WORK, I GOT TO STOP BY THE UNIT WHERE I NORMALLY WORK & SEE MY FRIENDS (AKA COWORKERS) & LET THEM SEE FOR THEMSELVES THAT I'M OK. BECAUSE I'M ON A MEDICAL LEAVE OF ABSENCE FROM WORK, I HAVE DISCOVERED THAT I DON'T MISS THE WORK, PER SE, BUT I DO MISS THE PEOPLE. I SAW ALMOST EVERYONE EXCEPT BRUCE & SANDRA. MAYBE I CAN CATCH THEM NEXT TIME AROUND. WE HAD ENOUGH TIME TO STOP FOR A BITE OF LUNCH, CAREFULLY AVOIDING THE HOSPITAL CAFETERIA FOR TASTIER PASTURES ELSEWHERE. WE WERE ABLE TO GET TO SAINT AGNES HOSPITAL A FEW MINUTES EARLY TO CHECK IN & WERE KINDLY ESCORTED BY A VOLUNTEER TO THE OUTPATIENT INFUSION ROOM ON THE SECOND FLOOR. I'VE NEVER BEEN THERE BEFORE SO WOULD NEVER HAVE FOUND IT ON MY OWN. IT WAS A VERY BUSY PLACE WITH A LOT GOING ON FOR THE NURSES ON A NONSTOP BASIS. ARTIE KEPT ME COMPANY & EVERYONE DID A GREAT JOB. IT JUST TOOK A LONG LONG TIME. WE DECIDED IT MUST BE BLOOD TRANSFUSION DAY AS EVERYONE THERE WAS GETTING BLOOD TRANSFUSIONS OF ONE SORT OR ANOTHER. WE WERE INFORMED THAT EVERY DAY THERE IS "TRANSFUSION DAY". WE ENDED UP BEING THERE FROM 1 PM TO ABOUT 5:45 PM. IT'S A GOOD THING I ALWAYS BRING WORD PUZZLE BOOKS & READING MATERIAL. MY MOTHER-IN-LAW GOT ME HOOKED ON FILL IN PUZZLES. IT REALLY HELPS PASS THE TIME. ONE OF THE OTHER PATIENTS NEXT TO ME NAMED STEVE WAS SO SO SICK. HE'S GONE THROUGH CHEMOTHERAPY & RADIATION & BEAT THE CANCER COMPLETELY, BUT DUE TO COMPLICATIONS HAS A SEVERE AUTOIMMUNE ISSUE CAUSING HIM TO HAVE GREAT DIFFICULTY BREATHING, SEVERE WEIGHT LOSS & WEAKESS TO THE POINT WHERE HE COULDN'T SIT IN A RECLINER LIKE THE REST OF US & HAD TO BE CAREFULLY PUT INTO THE ONLY BED ON THE UNIT. HIS WIFE HAD TO SUCTION HIM FREQUENTLY TO MAKE HIM LESS "JUICY" & MORE COMFORTABLE. HIS SISTER & FATHER-IN-LAW WERE THERE TOO GIVING HELP, SUPPORT, & BEING OH SO POSITIVE. I WAS VERY IMPRESSED WITH THEM ALL. ONE OF THE NURSES IN THE UNIT WAS ABLE TO MAKE SOME RECOMMENDATIONS TO HIS FAMILY THAT SHOULD HELP WITH HIS CARE & COMFORT. I FEEL LIKE MY PROBLEMS ARE SO SMALL COMPARED TO HIS. I COULD WALK IN & OUT ON MY OWN TWO FEET & HAVEN'T LOST ENOUGH WEIGHT TO COUNT. I DO GET TIRED A LOT, BUT NOTHING LIKE HE IS FACING. I KNOW YOU WILL ALL CONTINUE TO PRAY FOR ME AS MY ADVENTURE CONTINUES, BUT PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PRAY FOR STEVE, TOO. REMEMBER HIM TO THE GOD WHO IS BIGGER THAN CANCER & BIGGER THAN AUTOIMMUNE DISORDERS. I KNOW I WILL BE. WHEN I TOLD HIS FAMILY I WOULD ADD HIM TO MY PRAYER LIST, THEIR UNSELFISH RESPONSE WAS THAT THEY WOULD BE PRAYING FOR ME TOO. WHAT A FAMILY! NO MATTER WHERE YOU ARE IN LIFE & NO MATTER WHAT YOU ARE GOING THROUGH, THERE IS ALWAYS SOMEONE WORSE OFF THAN YOU. SOMEONE WHO NEEDS HELP, SOMEONE WHO NEEDS ENCOURAGEMENT, SOMEONE THAT NEEDS A KIND WORD, SOMEONE WHO NEEDS A PRAYER, SOMEONE WHO NEEDS A LITTLE DIVINE INTERVENTION. YOU JUST HAVE TO OPEN YOUR EYES & LOOK AROUND. IT PUTS THINGS INTO PERSPECTIVE.
Thursday, April 7, 2011
SNOW, TRANSFUSIONS, FLAN & ANOTHER INTERESTING DAY
HI ALL! THANK YOU AGAIN FOR YOUR LOVE, PRAYERS, & CONCERN. IT REALLY HELPS ME TREMENDOUSLY! I'VE HAD A VERY BUSY DAY & STILL FEEL ALIVE & KICKING. A NEW BIBLE STUDY STARTED AT CHURCH & I HAD ENOUGH OOMPH (ENERGY) TO DRIVE MYSELF THERE AND BACK HOME WHICH HASN'T HAPPENED VERY MUCH LATELY. I HAD JUST ENOUGH TIME TO GET HOME, EAT LUNCH, & GO TO MY ONCOLOGIST OFFICE IN FRESNO FOR A NON-CHEMO VISIT & LAB CHECK WITH MY HUSBAND. IT'S A GOOD THING HE'S SELF EMPLOYED NOW, BECAUSE A BOSS AT A REGULAR JOB JUST WOULDN'T UNDERSTAND OR ALLOW FOR THE FREQUENT TIME OFF HE HAS HAD TO TAKE TO STAY ON TOP OF ALL MY MEDICAL ISSUES. I REALLY FEEL FOR WHAT MY DAD WENT THROUGH WHEN HE WAS TRYING TO WORK, & CARE FOR MY MOM FOR THE 4 YEARS BEFORE SHE DIED. HE'S A PRETTY STRONG & COURAGEOUS GUY. I REALLY ADMIRE THAT ABOUT HIM & KNOW THE LORD HELPED HIM THROUGH THAT PROCESS LIKE HE'S HELPING ME & MY FAMILY NOW.
TODAY WE FOUND OUT THAT MY WHITE BLOOD CELL COUNT DROPPED SIGNIFICANTLY LOW AFTER LAST WEEKS' CHEMO JUST LIKE THE FIRST TIME, BUT THAT MY RED BLOOD CELL COUNT ALSO HAS CRASHED ENOUGH THAT I WILL BE RECEIVING A BLOOD TRANSFUSION TOMORROW AFTERNOON AT ST AGNES HOSPITAL IN FRESNO (AS AN OUTPATIENT). THIS ISN'T HIGHLY UNUSUAL FOR A CHEMO PATIENT, JUST HAPPENING A LITTLE FASTER & STRONGER THAN THE AVERAGE BEAR. THE GOOD IN ALL OF THIS IS THAT IT SHOULD ACTUALLY HELP ME FEEL A LITTLE BETTER. ALSO, BECAUSE I AM REACTING FASTER & STRONGER, THE ONCOLOGIST HAS DECIDED TO DECREASE MY CHEMO DOSES BY 20% FROM HERE ON OUT, WHICH IS ALSO BETTER FOR ME. WE WENT OVER TO ST AGNES TO PREREGISTER & FIGURE OUT WHERE TO GO & WHAT TO DO WHICH SHOULD SIMPLIFY TOMORROW'S PROCESS CONSIDERABLY. AFTER THAT, MY 2 KIDS & MY DAUGHTERS 2 KIDS JOINED US IN FRESNO FOR A YUMMY DINNER AT ACAPULCO RESTAURANT WHERE THEY HAVE THE BEST WARM CHIPS & FRESH SALSA IN TOWN. WE WERE CELEBRATING A BELATED BIRTHDAY FOR ARTIE & EVEN SPLURGED & GOT 4 DIFFERENT DESSERTS (INCLUDING FLAN) TO SPLIT BETWEEN THE SIX OF US. IT WAS SCRUPDIDLYUMPTIOUS (I HAVE NO IDEA HOW YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO SPELL THAT WORD). THE WAITRESS WAS SUPERB, THE FOOD WAS WONDERFUL, THE COMPANY WAS THE BEST. WE WERE SO STUFFED, THEY ALMOST HAD TO ROLL US OUT OF THE PLACE. THE ONLY ONES MISSING WERE MY SON-IN-LAW JON WHO IS IN THE STATE OF WASHINGTON THIS WEEKEND PLAYING GUITAR FOR HIS BROTHER'S PRESENTATION AT A WORSHIP CONFERENCE & MY DAUGTER-IN-LAW & HER KIDS WHO I STILL CONSIDER MY GRANDKIDS. SHE & MY SON WERE SEPARATED & RECENTLY DIVORCED. IT IS ONE OF THE GREATEST SORROWS IN MY LIFE & HIS. I LOVE HER DEARLY & PROBABLY ALWAYS WILL & MISS THEM ALL A GREAT DEAL. I KNOW SHE HAS A WOUNDED HEART THAT ONLY TIME AND GOD CAN HEAL. AND I KNOW GOD'S NOT DONE WITH ALL OF US YET. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP ON ANY OF US, EVEN IF WE DO.
HALFWAY HOME WE WERE SHOCKED & PLEASANTLY SURPRISED TO SEE SNOW ON THE GROUND IN SELMA. YES, I SAID SNOW ON THE GROUND IN SELMA! YESTERDAY HAD BEEN WARM & SUNNY. TODAY WAS COLD & RAINY. APPARENTLY SELMA HAD BEEN COLD ENOUGH RIGHT THEN & THERE FOR SNOW, AS IT HAD BEEN CLEAR WHEN THE KIDS HAD PASSED THAT WAY A COUPLE OF HOURS EARLIER. WHAT A SWEET & UNEXPECTED SURPRISE TO SEE SNOW. ONE FAMILY EVEN STOPPED THEIR CAR & LET THE KIDS GET OUT TO EXPERIENCE THE UNEXPECTED PLEASURE. WE WERE IN 2 DIFFERENT CARS SO JUST SMILED & LAUGHED & POINTED. ISN'T GOD JUST THE BEST? HE ALWAYS KNOWS HOW TO MAKE US SMILE.
MY FINAL ENTRY FOR TODAY IS TO ASK YOU TO PRAY FOR A:
1.)SAFE TRANSFUSION TOMORROW WITHOUT ANY SIDE EFFECTS
2.)TOLERANCE FOR LOWER DOSE CHEMO NEXT THURSDAY 14th
3.)CONTINUED SHRINKAGE IN TUMOR SIZE WHICH JUST STARTED!!
4.)HEALING FOR MY SONS BROKEN HEART & THAT HE WON'T GIVE
UP ON GOD ANSWERING HIS PRAYERS.
5.)HEALING FOR MY DAUGHTER-IN-LAW'S BROKEN HEART/LIFE
AND THAT SHE WILL GIVE GOD A CHANCE. SHE HAD TO GROW
UP TOO SOON, RAISE HER SIBLINGS, & DEAL WITH THINGS NO
CHILD SHOULD HAVE TO.
6.)TRAVELING MERCIES FOR MY SON-IN-LAW JON & HIS GROUP
7.)GRACE & BLESSING FOR MY DAUGHTER & HER 2 LITTLE BOYS
AS THEY MISS THEIR DADDY & MINISTER LIFE TO ME.
8.)HELP WITH THE RIGHT WORDS & TIMING FOR SOMETHING THE
LORD HAS INSTRUCTED ME TO DO.
BLESSINGS ON YOU ALL! OUR GOD IS SO GOOD!
TODAY WE FOUND OUT THAT MY WHITE BLOOD CELL COUNT DROPPED SIGNIFICANTLY LOW AFTER LAST WEEKS' CHEMO JUST LIKE THE FIRST TIME, BUT THAT MY RED BLOOD CELL COUNT ALSO HAS CRASHED ENOUGH THAT I WILL BE RECEIVING A BLOOD TRANSFUSION TOMORROW AFTERNOON AT ST AGNES HOSPITAL IN FRESNO (AS AN OUTPATIENT). THIS ISN'T HIGHLY UNUSUAL FOR A CHEMO PATIENT, JUST HAPPENING A LITTLE FASTER & STRONGER THAN THE AVERAGE BEAR. THE GOOD IN ALL OF THIS IS THAT IT SHOULD ACTUALLY HELP ME FEEL A LITTLE BETTER. ALSO, BECAUSE I AM REACTING FASTER & STRONGER, THE ONCOLOGIST HAS DECIDED TO DECREASE MY CHEMO DOSES BY 20% FROM HERE ON OUT, WHICH IS ALSO BETTER FOR ME. WE WENT OVER TO ST AGNES TO PREREGISTER & FIGURE OUT WHERE TO GO & WHAT TO DO WHICH SHOULD SIMPLIFY TOMORROW'S PROCESS CONSIDERABLY. AFTER THAT, MY 2 KIDS & MY DAUGHTERS 2 KIDS JOINED US IN FRESNO FOR A YUMMY DINNER AT ACAPULCO RESTAURANT WHERE THEY HAVE THE BEST WARM CHIPS & FRESH SALSA IN TOWN. WE WERE CELEBRATING A BELATED BIRTHDAY FOR ARTIE & EVEN SPLURGED & GOT 4 DIFFERENT DESSERTS (INCLUDING FLAN) TO SPLIT BETWEEN THE SIX OF US. IT WAS SCRUPDIDLYUMPTIOUS (I HAVE NO IDEA HOW YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO SPELL THAT WORD). THE WAITRESS WAS SUPERB, THE FOOD WAS WONDERFUL, THE COMPANY WAS THE BEST. WE WERE SO STUFFED, THEY ALMOST HAD TO ROLL US OUT OF THE PLACE. THE ONLY ONES MISSING WERE MY SON-IN-LAW JON WHO IS IN THE STATE OF WASHINGTON THIS WEEKEND PLAYING GUITAR FOR HIS BROTHER'S PRESENTATION AT A WORSHIP CONFERENCE & MY DAUGTER-IN-LAW & HER KIDS WHO I STILL CONSIDER MY GRANDKIDS. SHE & MY SON WERE SEPARATED & RECENTLY DIVORCED. IT IS ONE OF THE GREATEST SORROWS IN MY LIFE & HIS. I LOVE HER DEARLY & PROBABLY ALWAYS WILL & MISS THEM ALL A GREAT DEAL. I KNOW SHE HAS A WOUNDED HEART THAT ONLY TIME AND GOD CAN HEAL. AND I KNOW GOD'S NOT DONE WITH ALL OF US YET. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP ON ANY OF US, EVEN IF WE DO.
HALFWAY HOME WE WERE SHOCKED & PLEASANTLY SURPRISED TO SEE SNOW ON THE GROUND IN SELMA. YES, I SAID SNOW ON THE GROUND IN SELMA! YESTERDAY HAD BEEN WARM & SUNNY. TODAY WAS COLD & RAINY. APPARENTLY SELMA HAD BEEN COLD ENOUGH RIGHT THEN & THERE FOR SNOW, AS IT HAD BEEN CLEAR WHEN THE KIDS HAD PASSED THAT WAY A COUPLE OF HOURS EARLIER. WHAT A SWEET & UNEXPECTED SURPRISE TO SEE SNOW. ONE FAMILY EVEN STOPPED THEIR CAR & LET THE KIDS GET OUT TO EXPERIENCE THE UNEXPECTED PLEASURE. WE WERE IN 2 DIFFERENT CARS SO JUST SMILED & LAUGHED & POINTED. ISN'T GOD JUST THE BEST? HE ALWAYS KNOWS HOW TO MAKE US SMILE.
MY FINAL ENTRY FOR TODAY IS TO ASK YOU TO PRAY FOR A:
1.)SAFE TRANSFUSION TOMORROW WITHOUT ANY SIDE EFFECTS
2.)TOLERANCE FOR LOWER DOSE CHEMO NEXT THURSDAY 14th
3.)CONTINUED SHRINKAGE IN TUMOR SIZE WHICH JUST STARTED!!
4.)HEALING FOR MY SONS BROKEN HEART & THAT HE WON'T GIVE
UP ON GOD ANSWERING HIS PRAYERS.
5.)HEALING FOR MY DAUGHTER-IN-LAW'S BROKEN HEART/LIFE
AND THAT SHE WILL GIVE GOD A CHANCE. SHE HAD TO GROW
UP TOO SOON, RAISE HER SIBLINGS, & DEAL WITH THINGS NO
CHILD SHOULD HAVE TO.
6.)TRAVELING MERCIES FOR MY SON-IN-LAW JON & HIS GROUP
7.)GRACE & BLESSING FOR MY DAUGHTER & HER 2 LITTLE BOYS
AS THEY MISS THEIR DADDY & MINISTER LIFE TO ME.
8.)HELP WITH THE RIGHT WORDS & TIMING FOR SOMETHING THE
LORD HAS INSTRUCTED ME TO DO.
BLESSINGS ON YOU ALL! OUR GOD IS SO GOOD!
Monday, April 4, 2011
CATCHING UP
IT'S BEEN A FEW DAYS SINCE I'VE BEEN ABLE TO UPDATE EVERYONE, SO I HAVE A LITTLE CATCHING UP TO DO . I HAD MY SECOND CHEMO TREATMENT ON THURSDAY MARCH 31st, JUST 3 WEEKS FROM THE FIRST ON MARCH 10th. ARTIE HAD TO WORK THAT DAY, SO MY SWEET DAUGHTER & GRANDKIDS TOOK ME TO THE APPOINTMENT IN FRESNO & WERE GOING TO HAVE TO HANG AROUND FOR A COUPLE OF HOURS IN THE WAITING ROOM WAITING FOR ME TO GET DONE. THE INFUSION ROOM WHERE YOU RECEIVE YOUR CHEMO, IS A LARGE SUNNY ROOM ON THE CORNER OF THE BUILDING WITH LOTS OF BIG PICTURE WINDOWS & LIGHT. THERE IS A NURSES STATION ON ONE SIDE SURROUNDED BY A LOT OF RECLINERS & IV PUMPS, ETC. KIDS AREN'T USUALLY ALLOWED IN THE TREATMENT ROOM BUT SINCE MOST OF THE OTHER PATIENTS WERE ALREADY GONE FOR THE DAY, THE NURSES MADE AN EXCEPTION & LET REBECCA & CALEB & BEN COME IN THE BACK & KEEP ME COMPANY FOR THE LAST HALF OF THE TREATMENT. ARTIE EVEN POPPED IN FOR A WHILE TO SEE HOW I WAS DOING. WE FELT VERY PRIVELEGED & VERY SPECIAL. THE KIDS EVEN GOT TO SHARE AN EMPTY RECLINER, EACH HAVE THEIR OWN HEADPHONES, & WATCH A MOVIE FOR THE REMAINDER OF THE TIME. THE PHARMACY TECH BROUGHT IN A BIG BOX OF TEDDY BEARS & LET 4 YEAR OLD BEN PICK WHICHEVER ONE HE WANTED TO TAKE HOME. HE WAS HAPPY TO ACCEPT & TOOK HIS TIME CHOOSING A CUTE MULTICOLOR BEAR THAT SUITED HIM TO A TEE. CALEB GOT THE SAME OFFER, BUT DUE TO HIS VERY MATURE 9 1/2 YEARS, CHOSE TO DECLINE. I WAS EVEN ABLE TO TRY MY FRIEND GRETCHEN'S SUGGESTION OF SUCKING ON ICE CHIPS DURING CHEMO, TO PREVENT THE MOUTH SORES FROM COMING BACK THAT HAD CAUSED ME SO MUCH PAIN & DIFFICULTY AFTER MY 1st TREATMENT. GRETCHEN WAS DIAGNOSED WITH BREAST CANCER 2 YEARS AGO & HAS BEEN THROUGH EVERY STEP IN THE PROCESS. SHE HAS HAD MANY VERY PRACTICAL TIPS TO HELP GET ME THROUGH THIS. SHE & OTHERS AT CHURCH HAVE OFFERED MUCH LOVE & SUPPORT, WHICH HAS BEEN BOTH SPIRITUAL & PRACTICAL TO THIS UNIQUE PROCESS. THE LORD ALWAYS KNOW WHAT WE NEED & PROVIDES EXACTLY THAT. IT'S BEEN 4 DAYS NOW SINCE CHEMO & NO SORES IN SIGHT. PRAISE THE LORD!
FRIDAY APRIL 1st- I WAS SO TIRED THAT DAY ALL I WANTED TO DO WAS NAP. I DID A LOT OF SLEEPING & EVEN SLEPT WELL THROUGH THE NIGHT. I MUST HAVE REALLY NEEDED IT, BECAUSE I FELT MUCH BETTER THE NEXT DAY.
SATURDAY APRIL 2nd- I PERKED UP ENOUGH FOR A TRIP TO VISALIA WITH BECKY. WE WENT TO JOANN'S CRAFTS TO PICK OUT SOME YARN, SO BECKY COULD KNIT ME A CUTE HAT I HAD FOUND IN A KNITTING BOOK. IT'S GOING TO ADD TO MY SMALL COLLECTION OF HEAD COVERINGS NECESSARY TO COVER MY NOW ALMOST COMPLETELY BALD LITTLE HEAD. I HAVE 2 WIGS, 3 SCARVES THAT I'M LEARNING TO TIE IN PRETTY WAYS, AND NOW AM TRYING TO ADD SOME HATS WITH GOOD HEAD COVERAGE. IT'S KIND OF FUN TO TRY SOME NEW THINGS. WE ALSO NEEDED A FEW THINGS FROM COSTCO & SO, BECAUSE I WAS STILL FEELING SEMI OK, I WALKED IN TOO, FIGURING I COULD ALWAYS SIT DOWN IN THE FOOD COURT & REST IF I DIDN'T MAKE IT TOO FAR. YOU KNOW THE OLD MOTTO OF SHOP TIL YOU DROP? I DECIDED I'D PUT IT TO THE TEST. NEVER FEAR THOUGH, MY DAUGHTER WOULD HAVE STOPPED ME IF I NEEDED IT. FORTUNATELY WHEN WE WALKED IN, THERE WERE THESE RIDE ON SHOPPING CARTS RIGHT THERE IN THE FRONT. WE BOTH SAW THEM AT THE SAME TIME & THE SAME THOUGHT POPPED INTO BOTH OF OUR HEADS AT THE SAME TIME. IF I EVER QUALIFIED FOR RIDING ONE, NOW WAS THE PERFECT TIME TO TRY. I HOPPED ON, SENT OUT AN ALL POINTS BULLETIN TO WARN OTHER SHOPPERS, AND FIGURED THE THING OUT WHILE HAVING A BLAST AT THE SAME TIME. SHE & I GIGGLED A LOT, BUT BOY DID IT SAVE A LOT OF ENERGY. WHAT GREAT FUN! AND MOST OF THE OTHER SHOPPERS LEFT THE STORE IN ONE PIECE. WHAT A GREAT BUT LONG DAY OF SHOPPING.
SUNDAY APRIL 3rd- WHAT A GLORIOUS DAY! I FELT UP TO GOING TO CHURCH, ALTHOUGH MY HUBBY DIDN'T. HE STARTED COMING DOWN WITH A COLD. REBECCA & THE BOYS WERE MORE THAN WILLING TO TAKE ME TO CHURCH. THEY'LL BE MISSING MY SON-IN-LAW JON, WHO WON'T BE ABLE TO COME UP FOR HIS USUAL VISIT THIS WEEKEND OR THE NEXT. HE IS SUCH A GOOD DADDY & HUSBAND. WORKING DOWN SOUTH & DRIVING 4 HOURS TO VISIT ALMOST EVERY WEEKEND TAKES A GREAT DEAL OF LOVE & SACRIFICE. I REALLY APPRECIATE HIM A LOT! CHURCH WAS GREAT AS USUAL. YOU CAN REALLY FEEL THE PRESENCE OF THE LORD THERE. THE PASTOR HAD SPECIAL PRAYER FOR DEBBIE, WHO COLLAPSED A FEW WEEKS AGO IN THE GYM. SHE WAS DIAGNOSED WITH A BRAIN ANEURISM & IT'S A MIRACLE THAT SHE SURVIVED. LESS THAN 1% DO. SHE WAS WEARING A BIG FLOPPY HAT TO COVER HER SHAVED HEAD AFTER SURGERY & SLOWLY MADE HER WAY UP TO THE FRONT USING HER WALKER WITH HER TEARFUL FAMILY CLOSE BY HER SIDE . SHE'S COME A LONG WAY, BUT STILL HAS A LONG WAY TO GO. THE PASTOR HAD EVERYONE PRAY FOR HER & THEN ASKED EVERYBODY TO STAND WHO HAD CANCER FOR SPECIAL PRAYER. I STOOD UP & MY FRIEND LISA STOOD UP & THE WHOLE CHURCH PRAYED FOR US ALL. IT WAS QUITE A BLESSING. GOD IS REAL & IS WORKING & TOUCHING LIVES EVERY DAY & ALL THE TIME. YOU JUST HAVE TO LOOK AROUND TO SEE. I KNOW WE ARE ALL GOING TO HAVE A LOT MORE STORIES TO TELL BY THE TIME HE IS DON WITH US. GOD IS SO GOOD!
MONDAY APRIL 4th- HOW DID IT GET TO BE APRIL ALREADY? MY HUSBAND, ARTIE, IS STILL A LITTLE UNDER THE WEATHER, BUT PLUGGING ALONG AS USUAL. MY DAUGHTER BECKY IS ALSO FEELING LIKE SHE'S CATCHING A COLD. MY SON, DAVID, & GRANDKIDS & I ARE ALL TRYING OUR BEST NOT TO CATCH ANYTHING, (WE HAVE QUITE A HOUSEFUL RIGHT NOW, INCLUDING 2 DOGS). MY SINUSES FEEL LIKE THEY ARE FILLING UP AGAIN & GIVING ME A BAD HEADACHE & FEVER. I ALREADY HAD AN APPOINTMENT SCHEDULED FOR TODAY WITH MY ALLERGY DOCTOR, WHO I LOVE. HE USED TO WORK AT CHILDREN'S HOSPITAL LIKE ME, HAS A WELL ROUNDED EXPERIENCE, AND A FAMILY HISTORY OF BREAST CANCER WITH HIS AUNT & MOM & SISTER, SO HAS A LOT OF COMPASSION & UNDERSTANDING OF WHERE I'M AT RIGHT NOW. HE WAS ABLE TO CHANGE UP MY ANTIBIOTIC & BREATHING TREATMENT REGIMEN TO HOPEFULLY ERRADICATE THIS PESKY SINUS PROBLEM THAT KEEPS TRYING TO TAKE OVER AFTER CHEMO SHUTS DOWN MY IMMUNE SYSTEM DOWN SOME MORE. PLEASE PRAY THAT 1.)MY INFECTIONS WILL CLEAR UP COMPLETELY, 2.) MY FAMILY WILL GET BETTER & STAY HEALTHY (WHICH WILL HELP ME TOO), 3.) PLEASE PRAY THAT MY LIVER TRANSPLANT DOCTORS WILL ALLOW ME TO STAY AT A LOWER DOSE OF MY IMMUNOSUPPRESSION MEDICINE THAT I'M CURRENTLY ON. (FOR THOSE THAT DON'T KNOW, I HAD A LIVER TRANSPLANT TOO, ALMOST 12 YEARS AGO. THEY'RE CONSIDERING UPPING MY MEDS A LITTLE BECAUSE MY LEVELS WERE LOW WITH MY LAST LABS. THE MEDICINE KEEPS MY BODY FROM REJECTING THE RELATIVELY NEW LIVER BUT MAKES ME MORE SUSEPTIBLE TO INFECTIONS ALL THE TIME. ACCORDING TO MY ONCOLOGIST OFFICE, I'VE HAD AN INITIAL STRONGER REACTION THAN SOME TO THE CHEMOTHERAPY BECAUSE OF BEING ON MEDS TO SUPPRESS MY IMMUNE SYSTEM FOR THE LAST 12 YEARS SINCE MY LIVER TRANSPLANT. ANYWAY, YOU CAN EASILY GET A VICIOUS CIRCLE GOING THERE WITH ONE TREATMENT CANCELLING OUT ANOTHER. 4.)PRAY THAT THE LORD WILL HELP THEM COORDINATE MY CARE & TREATMENT IN THE BEST WAY POSSIBLE FOR WHAT I NEED. 5.) PRAY THAT I WILL CONTINUE WITH MORE GOOD DAYS THAN BAD DAYS. 6.) PRAY THAT THE LORD & I CONTINUE TO HAVE BEAUTIFUL TIMES TOGETHER LIKE WE DID THIS MORNING. HE IS SO GOOD & I AM SO GLAD HE LOVED ME ENOUGH NOT TO LEAVE ME THE WAY I WAS. HE IS CHANGING ME THROUGH THIS EXPERIENCE INTO SOMEONE WHO KNOWS SHE IS LOVED, & CARED FOR. SOMEONE WHO IS PURSUING GOD, SOMEONE WHO ISN'T RUSHING THROUGH LIFE AT 90 MILES AN HOUR JUST SURVIVING. SHE'S GOING TO SURVIVE & SHE'S GOING TO THRIVE. IT'S ALREADY HAPPENING. PTL!
FRIDAY APRIL 1st- I WAS SO TIRED THAT DAY ALL I WANTED TO DO WAS NAP. I DID A LOT OF SLEEPING & EVEN SLEPT WELL THROUGH THE NIGHT. I MUST HAVE REALLY NEEDED IT, BECAUSE I FELT MUCH BETTER THE NEXT DAY.
SATURDAY APRIL 2nd- I PERKED UP ENOUGH FOR A TRIP TO VISALIA WITH BECKY. WE WENT TO JOANN'S CRAFTS TO PICK OUT SOME YARN, SO BECKY COULD KNIT ME A CUTE HAT I HAD FOUND IN A KNITTING BOOK. IT'S GOING TO ADD TO MY SMALL COLLECTION OF HEAD COVERINGS NECESSARY TO COVER MY NOW ALMOST COMPLETELY BALD LITTLE HEAD. I HAVE 2 WIGS, 3 SCARVES THAT I'M LEARNING TO TIE IN PRETTY WAYS, AND NOW AM TRYING TO ADD SOME HATS WITH GOOD HEAD COVERAGE. IT'S KIND OF FUN TO TRY SOME NEW THINGS. WE ALSO NEEDED A FEW THINGS FROM COSTCO & SO, BECAUSE I WAS STILL FEELING SEMI OK, I WALKED IN TOO, FIGURING I COULD ALWAYS SIT DOWN IN THE FOOD COURT & REST IF I DIDN'T MAKE IT TOO FAR. YOU KNOW THE OLD MOTTO OF SHOP TIL YOU DROP? I DECIDED I'D PUT IT TO THE TEST. NEVER FEAR THOUGH, MY DAUGHTER WOULD HAVE STOPPED ME IF I NEEDED IT. FORTUNATELY WHEN WE WALKED IN, THERE WERE THESE RIDE ON SHOPPING CARTS RIGHT THERE IN THE FRONT. WE BOTH SAW THEM AT THE SAME TIME & THE SAME THOUGHT POPPED INTO BOTH OF OUR HEADS AT THE SAME TIME. IF I EVER QUALIFIED FOR RIDING ONE, NOW WAS THE PERFECT TIME TO TRY. I HOPPED ON, SENT OUT AN ALL POINTS BULLETIN TO WARN OTHER SHOPPERS, AND FIGURED THE THING OUT WHILE HAVING A BLAST AT THE SAME TIME. SHE & I GIGGLED A LOT, BUT BOY DID IT SAVE A LOT OF ENERGY. WHAT GREAT FUN! AND MOST OF THE OTHER SHOPPERS LEFT THE STORE IN ONE PIECE. WHAT A GREAT BUT LONG DAY OF SHOPPING.
SUNDAY APRIL 3rd- WHAT A GLORIOUS DAY! I FELT UP TO GOING TO CHURCH, ALTHOUGH MY HUBBY DIDN'T. HE STARTED COMING DOWN WITH A COLD. REBECCA & THE BOYS WERE MORE THAN WILLING TO TAKE ME TO CHURCH. THEY'LL BE MISSING MY SON-IN-LAW JON, WHO WON'T BE ABLE TO COME UP FOR HIS USUAL VISIT THIS WEEKEND OR THE NEXT. HE IS SUCH A GOOD DADDY & HUSBAND. WORKING DOWN SOUTH & DRIVING 4 HOURS TO VISIT ALMOST EVERY WEEKEND TAKES A GREAT DEAL OF LOVE & SACRIFICE. I REALLY APPRECIATE HIM A LOT! CHURCH WAS GREAT AS USUAL. YOU CAN REALLY FEEL THE PRESENCE OF THE LORD THERE. THE PASTOR HAD SPECIAL PRAYER FOR DEBBIE, WHO COLLAPSED A FEW WEEKS AGO IN THE GYM. SHE WAS DIAGNOSED WITH A BRAIN ANEURISM & IT'S A MIRACLE THAT SHE SURVIVED. LESS THAN 1% DO. SHE WAS WEARING A BIG FLOPPY HAT TO COVER HER SHAVED HEAD AFTER SURGERY & SLOWLY MADE HER WAY UP TO THE FRONT USING HER WALKER WITH HER TEARFUL FAMILY CLOSE BY HER SIDE . SHE'S COME A LONG WAY, BUT STILL HAS A LONG WAY TO GO. THE PASTOR HAD EVERYONE PRAY FOR HER & THEN ASKED EVERYBODY TO STAND WHO HAD CANCER FOR SPECIAL PRAYER. I STOOD UP & MY FRIEND LISA STOOD UP & THE WHOLE CHURCH PRAYED FOR US ALL. IT WAS QUITE A BLESSING. GOD IS REAL & IS WORKING & TOUCHING LIVES EVERY DAY & ALL THE TIME. YOU JUST HAVE TO LOOK AROUND TO SEE. I KNOW WE ARE ALL GOING TO HAVE A LOT MORE STORIES TO TELL BY THE TIME HE IS DON WITH US. GOD IS SO GOOD!
MONDAY APRIL 4th- HOW DID IT GET TO BE APRIL ALREADY? MY HUSBAND, ARTIE, IS STILL A LITTLE UNDER THE WEATHER, BUT PLUGGING ALONG AS USUAL. MY DAUGHTER BECKY IS ALSO FEELING LIKE SHE'S CATCHING A COLD. MY SON, DAVID, & GRANDKIDS & I ARE ALL TRYING OUR BEST NOT TO CATCH ANYTHING, (WE HAVE QUITE A HOUSEFUL RIGHT NOW, INCLUDING 2 DOGS). MY SINUSES FEEL LIKE THEY ARE FILLING UP AGAIN & GIVING ME A BAD HEADACHE & FEVER. I ALREADY HAD AN APPOINTMENT SCHEDULED FOR TODAY WITH MY ALLERGY DOCTOR, WHO I LOVE. HE USED TO WORK AT CHILDREN'S HOSPITAL LIKE ME, HAS A WELL ROUNDED EXPERIENCE, AND A FAMILY HISTORY OF BREAST CANCER WITH HIS AUNT & MOM & SISTER, SO HAS A LOT OF COMPASSION & UNDERSTANDING OF WHERE I'M AT RIGHT NOW. HE WAS ABLE TO CHANGE UP MY ANTIBIOTIC & BREATHING TREATMENT REGIMEN TO HOPEFULLY ERRADICATE THIS PESKY SINUS PROBLEM THAT KEEPS TRYING TO TAKE OVER AFTER CHEMO SHUTS DOWN MY IMMUNE SYSTEM DOWN SOME MORE. PLEASE PRAY THAT 1.)MY INFECTIONS WILL CLEAR UP COMPLETELY, 2.) MY FAMILY WILL GET BETTER & STAY HEALTHY (WHICH WILL HELP ME TOO), 3.) PLEASE PRAY THAT MY LIVER TRANSPLANT DOCTORS WILL ALLOW ME TO STAY AT A LOWER DOSE OF MY IMMUNOSUPPRESSION MEDICINE THAT I'M CURRENTLY ON. (FOR THOSE THAT DON'T KNOW, I HAD A LIVER TRANSPLANT TOO, ALMOST 12 YEARS AGO. THEY'RE CONSIDERING UPPING MY MEDS A LITTLE BECAUSE MY LEVELS WERE LOW WITH MY LAST LABS. THE MEDICINE KEEPS MY BODY FROM REJECTING THE RELATIVELY NEW LIVER BUT MAKES ME MORE SUSEPTIBLE TO INFECTIONS ALL THE TIME. ACCORDING TO MY ONCOLOGIST OFFICE, I'VE HAD AN INITIAL STRONGER REACTION THAN SOME TO THE CHEMOTHERAPY BECAUSE OF BEING ON MEDS TO SUPPRESS MY IMMUNE SYSTEM FOR THE LAST 12 YEARS SINCE MY LIVER TRANSPLANT. ANYWAY, YOU CAN EASILY GET A VICIOUS CIRCLE GOING THERE WITH ONE TREATMENT CANCELLING OUT ANOTHER. 4.)PRAY THAT THE LORD WILL HELP THEM COORDINATE MY CARE & TREATMENT IN THE BEST WAY POSSIBLE FOR WHAT I NEED. 5.) PRAY THAT I WILL CONTINUE WITH MORE GOOD DAYS THAN BAD DAYS. 6.) PRAY THAT THE LORD & I CONTINUE TO HAVE BEAUTIFUL TIMES TOGETHER LIKE WE DID THIS MORNING. HE IS SO GOOD & I AM SO GLAD HE LOVED ME ENOUGH NOT TO LEAVE ME THE WAY I WAS. HE IS CHANGING ME THROUGH THIS EXPERIENCE INTO SOMEONE WHO KNOWS SHE IS LOVED, & CARED FOR. SOMEONE WHO IS PURSUING GOD, SOMEONE WHO ISN'T RUSHING THROUGH LIFE AT 90 MILES AN HOUR JUST SURVIVING. SHE'S GOING TO SURVIVE & SHE'S GOING TO THRIVE. IT'S ALREADY HAPPENING. PTL!
Friday, April 1, 2011
HAIR TODAY, GONE TOMORROW
I'M DOING OKAY. I'LL UPDATE MORE LATER. HERE ARE SOME PICTURES FROM MY JOURNEY. AT LEAST I STILL HAVE MY SMILE.
My wigs are looking sooooo pretty now
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